im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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