It's just like the Real World with babies
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize