So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
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The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
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It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
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