can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
