Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
