Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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