if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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