ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You are a booty call, not a friend.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize