he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Randomize
