Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
