Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
