I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
