dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
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This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
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we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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