The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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