she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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