I think this baby is eyeing my beer
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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