I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
