I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
