Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize