It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
