Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
