I accidentally burped into my bong.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize