I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
