did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
