he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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