hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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