There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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