Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
