OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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