Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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