sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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