how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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