i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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