There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
