There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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