If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
