I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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