i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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