the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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