so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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