I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I am naked and annoyed.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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