when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
