Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
lets start a swedish sibling band together
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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