Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
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TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
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He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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