just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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