Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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