i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
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