I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
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He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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