respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
