Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
